Do You Still Love the Judas in Your Life?

Do You Still Love the Judas in Your Life?

There’s a question most of us don’t want to answer honestly:

Do you still love the person who hurt you…
or are you holding onto who you thought they were?

Because those are not the same thing.

And if we’re honest, many of us are carrying relationships that God already revealed the truth about. We just haven’t had the courage to release them.

Jesus Had a Judas Too

In The Gospel of John, we see something both powerful and uncomfortable.

Jesus knew.

He knew who Judas was.
He knew what Judas would do.
And still… He washed his feet.

That kind of love is hard to comprehend. It wasn’t blind love. It wasn’t naïve love. It was intentional, aware, and grounded in truth.

But here’s what stands out:

Jesus loved Judas…
yet He did not chase him.
He did not try to control the outcome.
He did not abandon His purpose to keep Judas close.

That tension matters.

We Confuse Love with Access

Somewhere along the way, we started believing that loving someone means:

Keeping them close
Giving them endless chances
Ignoring what hurt us
Overextending ourselves to prove our loyalty

But love and access are not the same thing.

You can love someone… and not allow them to keep hurting you.
You can forgive someone… and still choose distance.
You can care deeply… and still walk away.

Even Jesus didn’t equate love with unlimited access.

The Truth About Betrayal

Betrayal doesn’t just come from enemies.
It comes from people who sat at your table.

People you trusted.
People you prayed with.
People you thought would never…

And when that happens, it shakes more than just your relationships. It shakes your identity, your discernment, and sometimes even your faith.

But here’s the truth we often avoid:

You are not responsible for someone else’s choices.

Judas made his own decision.
And Jesus did not carry the weight of fixing it.

Letting Go Doesn’t Mean You Didn’t Love Them

This is where many people get stuck.

You think that if you walk away, it means the love wasn’t real.
You think distance equals bitterness.
You think boundaries mean you’ve become cold.

But sometimes, walking away is the most honest form of love.

It says:

I release you to your choices.
I trust God with what I cannot change.
I will not sacrifice my peace to keep something God is asking me to let go of.

That is not rejection.
That is alignment.

Love Them… But Don’t Lose Yourself

Jesus never lost Himself in loving Judas.

He didn’t shrink.
He didn’t second-guess His calling.
He didn’t abandon His mission.

And neither should you.

Loving someone should never cost you your identity, your peace, or your obedience to God.

If it does… it’s time to pause and ask:

Am I loving them… or am I holding onto something God is asking me to release?

A Gentle Invitation to Reflect

Who in your life have you been holding onto…
even after God showed you the truth?

Are you staying out of love…
or out of fear, habit, or hope that they’ll change?

What would it look like to love them…
without losing yourself in the process?

Closing Thought

You can love someone deeply…
and still let them go peacefully.

Jesus did.

And that doesn’t make you unloving.
It means you’re finally walking in truth.